The Tom & Lorenzo Archives: 2006 -2011

Demi Moore for ELLE UK

Okay, girls. We've got a lot of ground to cover. Get your coffee and meet us in the conference room.

Elle UK May 2010

Photographer: David Slijper

Stylist: Anne-Marie Curtis

We say this without a shred of cynicism, but we really do have to hand it to Demi Moore. She is a star in the old school sense of the word. It really doesn't matter if she's working or even the quality of the work she puts out. The only thing that matters is that everyone is always looking at her and talking about her. She fascinates people for invisible reasons. Her oeuvre is largely middle-of-the-road fare with no awards and little critical recognition and her output has dwindled to practically nothing in recent years; she is beautiful, but not so much that it puts some people off (like, say, Angelina Jolie); her life is relatively scandal-free by Hollywood standards and somehow, that all comes together to land her magazine cover after magazine cover and a level of public interest that never seems to wane, no matter what she does (or doesn't do).

None of that is meant as a criticism. Demi Moore's career is being Demi Moore. And no one can deny, she is VERY good at being Demi Moore. Elle UK gave her another chance to talk about being Demi:

On her body obsession:

“I had an extreme obsession with my body. I made it a measure of my own value. I tried to dominate it, which I did, and I changed it multiple times over. But it never lasted and ultimately it didn’t bring me anything but temporary happiness. Does being thin resolve anything? No. The irony is that when I abandoned that desire to dominate my body, it actually became the body that I always wanted. But it only happened when I stopped trying to control it. At the end of the day, this kind of obsession is pointless and meaningless.”

On the public’s plastic surgery speculations:

“In truth, I wish there was a little bit less curiosity and fascination with how I look, whether it’s good or bad. I understand it, though, and I know it’s not something I can control. I only hope it’s serving some sort of purpose…. It feels like school-yard name-calling a lot of the time. It hurts. You know what? Maybe one day I’ll go under the knife. It just irritates me that people are constantly saying how much I’ve spent on plastic surgery.”

On her naked pregnant VF cover:

“I was brave. I was so brave! I had no sense of the impact that it would have. I just wanted to push the boundaries. When I said things like “I want it all”, that wasn’t coming from a place of greed. It was coming from a desire for balance. I wanted to remove the limitations that I felt were being imposed on me. Why couldn’t I be a mother and have a career?”

We were going to respond to each of these points, but we figured our assessment in the opening paragraphs of this post coupled with our upcoming assessment of the pictures is enough T Lo bitchery for one post. We're leaving this part up to you, our faithful minions. Discuss whether Demi said "I wish there was a little bit less curiosity and fascination with how I look" before or after she posed for these pictures. For extra credit: discuss whether or not you think she said it with a straight face.

Dolce & Gabbana Spring 2010 Collection
Model Ginta Lapina

We like the cover shot. The dress is cute and the shoes are killa. We're not loving the facial expression though.

Christian Dior Spring 2010 Collection
Model: R'el Dade

But THIS one, kittens. What the hell was everybody involved thinking? It looks like it might be a Photoshop-free picture, since her skin is showing the natural imperfections that every non-Photoshopped person has, and hey, that's great. Especially in light of the controversy regarding her missing hip bone on one of her previous covers. We're not criticizing her for looking human here, far from it. We're criticizing that horrible pose and facial expression. Plus the lighting's not all that flattering. By all means, go more "natural" in your pictures, but that doesn't mean you throw common sense out the window with your posing and lighting. And her hair looks like crap. And they ruined a cute dress with that corset.

There. We have done our jobs and spewed opinions in every direction for you to dissect. Have at it.

[Photo Credit:]

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