The Tom & Lorenzo Archives: 2006 -2011

2010 Tony Awards - Part 1

Broadway babies to the red carpet, please!

Cate Blanchett in Giorgio Armani Privé

We are deeply saddened to have to admit this, but apparently some items of clothing exist that don't automatically look good on Cate Blanchett. We're not quite sure why this doesn't work (we lie: bad fit, she removed the moon brooch which added a lot to the look, platform pumps that look like tennis shoes) but she should have realized that the minute she first tried it on. Cate, based on previous performance, we're gonna let you have this one but please don't let it happen again.

Helen Mirren

Queen Helen of Fuckinfantastica, however, continues her winning streak.

Jada Pinkett-Smith in Marchesa

It's an issue in celebrity reportage that never comes up, but we're willing to be the hard-hitting journalists and opinion-makers to tackle this controversial subject.

Sometimes, black people go overboard on the tanner too. There. We said it. Just because it's a more coppery shade of orange doesn't mitigate the fact're orange.

As for the dress...shrug. It's so Marchesa it's like a parody of Marchesa.

Kristin Chenoweth in Tony Ward Couture

Foregoing the fact that this is essentially a sequined towel and that she's showing an awful lot of skin for an awards ceremony that isn't set in South Beach and doesn't have "MTV" somewhere in the title, it's just not all that flattering a look. She has no figure in this thing.

Michele in Zac Posen

Don't love the hair and the bust sits a skosh too low, but she looks beautiful and she's rocking a highly unusual red carpet color, which is applause-worthy.

Naomi Watts in Roland Mouret

HATEHATEHATE the hair and eye makeup, but LOVELOVELOVE that dress. It's like Mildred Pierce rose from the dead and said "Fuck all these pies, I'ma go out looking like sex on a stick tonight!"

Scarlett Johanssen in Elie Saab Fall 2010

Were we her gays, we would suggest she retire that mohawk-style updo because she wears it way too often, but we would probably not get around to saying it because we'd be too busy clapping and shrieking "FIERCE!" at the sight of this killa dress.

Valerie Harper

We J'ADORE Rhoda and we would like to point out that she's done a very good job of aging. Much better than her old neighbor Mary in Minneapolis. Having said that, this is the very definition of what Michael Kors likes to call "very Mother of the Bride." When in doubt, Rhoda, have your gays call Helen Mirren's gays and set up a meeting.

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