The Tom & Lorenzo Archives: 2006 -2011

PR: Auf Wiedersehen, Part Eins

Rhymes with "glass bowl."

Minions, has any designer revealed their asshole qualities so quickly and in one episode? Our heads were spinning by the end of it. Let's do a little rundown of the assholic things that came out of his mouth last night:

* He dismissed Marie Claire as "not so much of a tough magazine." Although to be fair, we don't even know what that means.

* He decided that the show should completely change its criteria around his failings by opining that "the judges have to look past these little closures."

* He was completely delusional. "It was impeccable the way it was sewn."

* He blamed his model for his shitty garment. "She's a beautiful girl, just not a runway model."

* He admits to his own personality flaws and then quickly blames it on the rest of the world. "My whole life I've had a chip on my shoulder because I've been misunderstood since I was a child and I really don't care about what the other people think because they don't really interest me."

* He stomped off in a huff like the sore loser he is. "I don't have to wait for anything."

* And worst of all, WORST OF ALL, KITTENS, he had the nerve to say this upon receiving criticism from Tim: "I'm a straight man in a gay man's world," and therefore Tim should cut him a little slack.

No he didn't!

Listen, asshole. When you are barred from marrying, adopting children, serving in the military, visiting your spouse in the hospital, or even joining the fucking Boy Scouts, you get the right to whine about how unfair life is. When packs of gay men go around taunting, beating and even killing straight men, you get to whine about how unfair life is. When political parties use you as both a punching bag and a fundraising tool without ever doing anything to improve your lot in life or even ensuring that you have basic civil rights, you get to whine about how unfair life is. When Tim Gunn points out your piece of shit dress is a piece of shit dress, you thank him for the critique, get back to work, and try to salvage the mess you made.


When Jeffrey and Santino look like saints next to your self-centered, offensive complaining and complete disregard for anyone who isn't you, honey, you've really accomplished something there.

Oh, right. He made a dress, didn't he?

Model: Dre

Or rather, he "made" a "dress."

Because this is both ugly and a little ridiculous.

Fuck it. It doesn't deserve a critique from us. It's fucking ugly and everyone can see that.

In addition, he clearly has no concept of styling or how to present his work. This picture is laughably bad.

To be honest, we were a little surprised how easy the judges went on him for the safety pins. "Was that deliberate?" NO, it wasn't deliberate! Come on now, judges! He stapled his last garment together!

Although to be fair to them, they did auf him, to our shock. Just before the auf'ing we voiced our predictions: Nicholas would be auf, Peach would stay just to keep the older demographic represented for a little longer, and Jason would stay because they had a potential villain on their hands. We're still a little surprised that they let him go.

To be just a tiny little bit empathetic, we'll say that we got a very insecure vibe off the guy last night and it felt like he was just lashing out in an immature manner because he knew he was crashing and burning. It happens. No one's perfect. No doubt in the coming weeks there will be interviews about how badly he was represented and about all those mean (gay) bloggers who said terrible things about him on the internet. We cannot yawn hard enough. No one forces anyone to participate in a reality television show, nor is anyone handed a script on a show like this. Own what you said, Jason, because everyone heard it and the collective opinion is that you came across like a major asshole.

One more nice thing before we go. Looking at his pre-show portfolio it's fair to say he has some talent. Just because someone fucks up royally on a show like this doesn't mean they're a bad designer. Of course the smart ones realize this and manage to walk out the door with their dignity intact. It's the assholes who blame everyone else before stomping off.

Okay, maybe that wasn't as nice as we planned.

Tim Gunn's Workroom:

Extended Judging:

[Screencaps: - Video Credit: - Photo Credit: Barbara Nitke/]

Post a Comment

Labels: , , ,

BALMAIN for women